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The Day After Tomorrow...

...Will the start of a brand new year. But honestly speaking I don't really feel a lot of the New Year spirit either. I just realised that tomorrow is New Year's Eve and I do not have any planned or even proposed activity on how to celebrate my NYE. Nobody has called me yet, I haven't called anybody, and I think this status quo would stay the same even until the stroke of midnight tomorrow.

What has 2006 been for me? Well, a good 80% of my 2006 was wasted supposedly serving the nation, by asking people to do physical exercises and at the same time teach them to fall down [as if they don't already know how] and ocassionally enjoying a few rounds of DOTA in between. Other than that, I think the most significant moments of my 2006 are as follows...


1. Freedom from having to serve the nation

2. Getting my first full-time job

3. Buying my N73

4. Taking part in my first Karoake Contest

5. Getting a new pair of specs


As you can see, 2006 hasn't really been an exciting year for me. I'll try to fill up the list if I remember any other semi-significant events in 2006, but as of now, yup, that's my boring life.

I miss the days of adolescence, when life was care-free and all we ever wanted to do was to enjoy ourselves to the max. Gone were the days of sitting around at a coffee shop, chatting away into the night, or those maniac outings where the whole group of us had so much fun together. Right now, everybody's growing up, those who need monetary satisfaction have plunged into the working world, others who seekknowledge have moved on to the respective Unis. To each his own path, braving the new challenges that he faces ahead, not turning back to reminscense the memories of the past.

Currently the person that I spend the most time with, apart from my dear, is Acey, my precious laptop. Am I becoming an anti-social, cyber-addicted freak who gives his laptop names? Have I forgotten about my family and friends of the real world? Who can pull me out of this lonesome and boring monotoneous life of technology that the world has bestowed upon me?

Most probably tomorrow will be no different from any other passing day of my boring life, which most probably will just fly past as quickly as a mosquito on steroids and thus bringing an end to the boring year of 2006. Hopefully 2007 will bring more excitement and joy to everybody, especially myself. Happy New Year's Eve to everybody in advance.

A Death Note could definitely make my life more interesting... How about something like this:



ANYHOWBLOGS
Dies peacefully on the stroke on midnight on 31 Dec 2006 when he climaxes while in bed with 3 cute, voluptuous Japanese identical triplets.




I wouldn't mind that at all...


Anyhow written on Dec 30, 2006 at 10:30 PM

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PPP : PayPerPost Blog


$$$ This is a PayPerPost Advert $$$


Have you ever wondered what goes on behind the scenes at the PayPerPost crew? To lazy to go to youtube to watch thier videos? Don't fret! Did you know that PayPerPost has their very own personal company blog too? Just visit their blog to have a quick glimpse into the glamour and glitz that makes PayPerPost so special.

You'll find everything in here, including the latest news and updates on what's happening around them and they even upload their crazy videos here for your viewing pleasure. Did I also mention that they even have loads of cool pictures? So what are you waiting for? Go check it out now at http://blog.payperpost.com and don't forget to leave a comment or 2.


Anyhow written onat 3:49 PM

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The Blogger Returns

Yes, and he returns with a BANG. Got loads of things to update you all this morning. Firstly, this week I am officially on a 1-day work week schedule thanks to my company's force-leave system. So here I am, all fresh and recharged, back in the office for the first and only time this week. And it's a Friday already! Boy, time really flys when you are having fun.


My Christmas was quite a fruitful one if I could say so myself, cos I got lots of new goodies during that eventful week. Firstly, I bought dear a pair of engraved couple rings from Couple Lab @ Plaza Sing. This is the first time I'm willingly wearing someone else's name on my hand, so you can really see how much I cherish our 5 long years of togetherness. May we live happily ever after. Yes, I know fairy tales don't exist, but let's just imagine only for a while...


I also stole aquired loads of goodies from my company's Christmas Luncheon. All in all I brought home 2 laptop bags, 2 tabletop calandars, an 11th prize lucky draw Rip Curl Watch and a $30 consolation prize cheque for participating in the karaoke contest, as well as a slight loss of face due to a bad choice of song, which otherwise would have definitely grabbed me a minimum of a 3rd prize. That damn DJ hired for the event didn't even have the Westlife version of 'Flying Without Wings' thus resulting in me having to sing on a pirated version which boasts of the usual ugly ang moh girl parading around a shopping center. Did I also mention the irritating "DING... DING..." sound within the background music? So it ain't really my fault that I couldn't get top 3 right?


And just yesterday, we went to Cathay Cineplex at Douby Ghout to catch the release of Death Note 2: The Last Name. For those of you who watched Death Note 1, this sequel is a must to catch if you jumped onto the Death Note fanclub bandwagon after Death Note 1. The story gets more interesting as both geniuses try to outwit each other, and with the addition of a 2nd Death Note book, you will never expect the twist and turns that come about when the story unfolds. Although the story is slightly different from the manga version that I'm currently chasing on youtube, it still carries the same amount of intelligence and entertainment as the movie. Oh, and by the way, The Grand Cathay is freaking big! I think it can easily sit 3 normal movie theatre patrons with room to spare. And the screen is covered by a huge red curtain that arrouses applause everytime the curtains move to reveals / hides the main screen, even when the main screen is a blank. And the best part is you pay the same amount as you would a normal movie show.


Just this morning, as I was on my way to work, my eagle eyes noticed something that I believe most of you don't know. Did you know that Bangalah construction workers gather together every morning in an open space within the construction compound to do...

MORNING PT [ PHYSICAL TRAINING ]


Yes you heard me right. MORNING PT. I too was shocked when I saw the typical chi-na sub-contractor with the balding head and bright yellow boots leading his 'men' in a full body warm-up cum stretching exercise. How come construction workers get better perks than us white-collared office staff? I too want to waste 15 minutes of my every morning doing silly workouts that obviously won't help in preventing injuries. I mean, have you ever heard of "Oh, my construction worker sprained his back while lifting heavy stuff" as apposed to "Oh, my worker got crushed by a falling girder when the crane's pully snapped". Yeah, so much for physical safety.


And another thing I've noticed these few weeks is that some Singaporean Tales are really true. Like the comic strip that we all grew up with 'Chew On It', remember the Singaporean style ah-gong, ah-ma and ah-boy comics? I distinctly remember he ever came up with a book of Singaporean rules on how to be 100% Singaporean, and one of the rules was : "The person who gets on the bus 1st never has his payment ready." In today's age of EZ-Link cards, this rule still stands true. Especially on rainy days... A big, fat person juggling with his handphone, bag and umbrella will unbelievablly always be the first to board the bus only to realize that the reader cannot detect his card within the junk that he keeps in his bag, therefore will stand on the 2nd step of the bus entrance, fiddling with is possessions, oblivious to the people behind him [who are obviously getting drenched by the rain] waiting for this idiot, without any form of consideration to at least move to the side and let others board 1st. Within 3 days, I actually came around 5 situations exactly like this, and this being the rainy season, I was obviously very pissed [not to mention drenched] at these inconsiderate Singaporeans.

There should be a fine for standing in a queue for too long. Talking about queues, have you ever heard of guys having to queue to use the restroom? Well, after the Death Note 2 movie, I actually had to wait in line with like 10 other guys to wait for our turn to use the wee-wee bin. What is this world coming to? The male toilet was made to be the more efficient and speedy of the 2 restrooms. Who ever heard of guys queueing for toilets? It pissed me off so bad that I decided to use the handicap toilet, and guess what? It was locked too... By a fat lady who took on quicker than 5 minutes to get her fat ass out off there.

NOTE OT PUBLIC : If you're not effiecient in your restroom eddiquette please DO NOT use the handicap toilets. What if a real handicap person needs to go urgently and a fat lady is occupying the toilet seat with one half of her butt trying to get her pad in place? If you cannot finish your business in 2 minutes DO NOT, i repeat, DO NOT use the handicap toilet! Unless of course you're not in there alone, that obviously is a different case, in that case, please try to finish in 15 minutes or less, and please try to keep the volume down, nobody outside needs to know that your lousy guy can't find the right hole.


Anyhow written on Dec 29, 2006 at 10:03 AM

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Stupid Earthquake

Finally blogger is back! For a moment, it had me worrying what happened to my internet connection, making me do all sorts of funny things to my router and my modem, obviously without any productive results. And all this because of some stupid earthquake in Taiwan that seemingly disrupted the underwater cables somewhere in the Little Mermaid's hometown.

Anyway, hope you guys have had an enjoyable Christmas. Been wanting to blog for the past few days but since the new blogger is linked with google accounts, everytime I click on the sign-in with 'new blogger' link, it gives me that stupid 404 Page Not Found error. But now when everything is well and dandy, I sorta forgotten what I actually wanted to blog about the past few days.

I assure you I have been pretty busy during this festive season, but I really don't have the feeling to write about any of it right now. Maybe check back in a day or two. In the meantime, I did a sex survey going around the net, and this is what my results looked like.





Err... yeah... Am I really that good?


Anyhow written on Dec 28, 2006 at 1:30 PM

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PPP : PPP Love

$$$ This is a PayPerPost Advert $$$


What's so good about payperpost? Well, for one, my 1st payperpost earned me a whooping 10 BUCKS! And this one will earn me another 10 BUCKS when it's approved. So just by posting 2 simple posts about their company, I've earned 20 BUCKS. Now ain't that simple money?

And the best part about PPP? You post on adverts that you yourself like or approve of! See anything that you don't feel comfortable adverting for? Well, you don't have to do anything for them! So what are you waiting for? Go click on the link below and start earning money from blogging right now! Oh, and did I mention that if you give the name of the person who recommended you to PPP, that person earns 15 bucks once your first PPP post is approved! So don't forget to say I recommended you to PPP! Remember to visit ads on blogs to earn money for blogging!


Anyhow written onat 1:08 PM

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Thursday's Random Funnys

Nothing much to post about today, so I decided to make a list of "Random" things that I could post on each day of the week when I have nothing to post about in the future. So far I've come up with a few but I still need more. Any suggestions will be greatly appriciated.

1. Monday's Random Perk Me Ups [To help cure those Monday Blues]

2. Tuesday's Random _____________ [fill in the blank if u please]

3. Wednesday's Random Picture

4. Thursday's Random Funny

5. Friday's Random MeMe. [Something that will tell u more about me]

6. Saturday's Random Blog link [Cos I don't usually have a lot of time to blog on Sats]

7. Sunday's Random _____________ [fill in the blank if u please]



So for today's random Funny, I found this funny contest from Mensa from another blog while surfing through the randomblog button. I thought it was worth sharing...



Don't Mensa your words

The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are this year's winners:


1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

5. Cashtration (n! .): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked t! hrough a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.


Anyhow written on Dec 21, 2006 at 11:46 AM

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Finally Some Sun

For the first time in like 48 hours, I see the sun shining brightly in my face. I know that December is the time of clouds and rain over here, but never did I expect the rain to go on for almost 24 hours non-stop yesterday.

Anyway, enough of the bad weather, at least the sun in shining now so we should talk about happier thoughts. Yesterday I went back to TP for the first time in 3 years after graduating to help my friend with her project. Everything looked almost the same except the IT canteen which was transformed into some sort of mordern day air-conditioned food court you see in those shopping centres, complete with brightly lit stall names. And the other major thing that I noticed was that 99% of the lecturers I spotted walking around that day were totally alien to me. In fact, I only recognised 1 familiar lecturer face throughout the day.

When I asked my friend about this, she said that most lecturers nowadays are on a part-time teaching basis, which means all the full-time lecturers either got bored of the school or decided to run off to greener pastures.

So anyway, there we were, in the comfort of the lab, trying to figure out how to get her project to produce an A so that she can pull her test results up, when I realised that the IT lecturers nowadays are not doing thier job very well. All they did was to flash the direct answers on the projector expecting the students to understand whatever nonsense they see on screen. This resulted in me having to teach almost the entire syllabus to my friend from scratch. If that's the case I think I should switch jobs and become a full-time lecturer. I hear the pay is good.

After a few lessons, all of a sudden it was already time for me to leave. And to my suprise [or not], the moment I stepped out of the lab, the rain decided that it was not strong enough and started to pour like there's no tommorrow. Opps, why am I talking about the rain again. Maybe because it pissed me off while I was making my way back home after watching Eragon. The entire area around my building was booby trapped with deep pools of mud water or innocently "shallow" looking puddles. We were like monkeys performing for a banana trying to get back to sheltered safety.

Oh by the way Eragon is nice. I encourage everyone to go watch it. The dragon is a female and she is actually quite "Chio" in terms of dragon beauty.


Anyhow written on Dec 20, 2006 at 11:06 AM

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PPP : RockStartup - Episode 3

$$$ This is a PayPerPost Advert $$$



RockStartup is a video series created by the PayPerPost mystro himself, discribing how the entire concept of PayPerPost was formed and how his company started and grew with time.

In this episode, watch how the PayPerPost crew shifts their office to a newer, nicer location in town. Watch how the new office space transforms from a normal, empty space to a colourful, comfortable working office. I particularly liked the part where he told the worker not to stand on the $700 chair. That was hilarious. Be sure to check out youtube.com for more RockStartup videos.

Also check out blog ads that earns you free $$$ from blogging.


Anyhow written on Dec 19, 2006 at 10:37 AM

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Christmas is here already?


For those who have beady eyes, it says "I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE"


Zip, bang, boom... Christmas is just around the corner, in fact it's just a few inches away. In exactly 1 week from now, everybody will start unwrapping their presents... [I physically got stuck here for almost 5 minutes] erm, and what else do we do on Christmas Day? Christmas has almost lost it's meaning here in sunny Singapore. It has turned into a season of pure revenue for the shopping malls and pure expenditure for the shopaholics. Not to mention spreading the 'joy' of wrapping or ripping apart carefully scotch-taped christmas-themed wrapping papers. Oh, and of course there's the 'love' of competing to see who's Christmas tree is the biggest / smallest / nicest / brightest / most colourful etc etc.

Where have the festivities gone to? Shouldn't there be more to Christmas than just giving and recieving presents? Look at the people outside our little red dot. They have carolling, sled riding, ice-skating, under-the-misletoe kissing, santa impersonation contests and not to mention the santarina shows. And compared to us, they have snow, but is that really an excuse? Do we go sun-tanning specifically for the Christmas period? The answer is a big fat NO.

I hate to be a wet blanket, but I hardly feel the Christmas spirit at all, apart from having our mainstream Orchard Road lit up so brightly that any blind man would be able to see it. Other than that, it's just normal people going around doing their normal shopping on a normal day with normal shopping centres running at their normal operating hours. See how normal it is? Oh, but there's definitely 1 difference during this Christmas period. It's the number of 'Charitable Organisations' that come out from hidding and openly ask people on the street for a kind donation. Do they really think that just because it's the "season of giving" we wil really be obligated to give more, or even give at all? I still turn them away without even batting an eyelid. Just count yourself unlucky to meet a black-hearted person like me.

Christmas is too departmentalized [say department store] if you ask me. It's just another scam by clever advertisers to get us foolish believers to spend more. Christmas is not about the physical act of giving, but rather that small little voice in your heart that squeeks "I want to bring a smile to someone's life" Unfortunately, people still think that getting presents will give a person joy.

All Christmas-es should end like this...




Anyhow written on Dec 18, 2006 at 2:14 PM

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Get Paid To Blog

Right, now that I've settled that little problem with PayPal, I can finally start earning money as I blog. Who doesn't want to earn cold hard cash just by writing a few comments about a particular service or product on their personal webspace? What's more, you don't have any obilgation to blog about it if you don't like it. So it's as simple as picking up something that you find interesting, and giving your own opinion on that product or service... And you get paid for it! More $$$ and more things to blog about, now that's what I call a WIN-WIN situation.

So how do we get in on the action you ask? Simple, just sign-up by clicking that big old link on the right of the page that shouts "GET PAID TO BLOG".
(the link isn't up yet, will let ya'll know once it's up)

And once your blog has been approved, you can start making money just by writing about things u like to write on. Did I also mention that you can also earn $$$ by referring new members to the program? Just like what I'm doing now. Every person successfully recruited through the above link earns me a whooping $15 bucks. So what are you waiting for? Go sign-up and start earning your own blog-cash now!!


Anyhow written on Dec 17, 2006 at 8:16 PM

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Generalisation

Sometimes don't you think the world has too many "conformist" rules that everybody just follows blindly? Everytime you think of doing something, something in your head will tell you "By right, you should be doing XXXXXX. Doing ZZZZZZ is not socially acceptable." And even in that last sentence itself, we are already conforming to such 'Rules', why must an unknown word or phrase be typed as XXXXXX? Why can't we type it as LLLLLLL or EEEEEEE? The answer : Everybody uses XXXXXX so it's easier to understand.


Let's talk about students. From young, we were taught that students should have short, neat & black hair, perfectly symatrical round spectacles, white BATA shoes and a ninja turtle school bag that can easily take up 80% of his classroom chair seating area. Seeing this image, we will label him as a GOOD student.

On the other hand, seeing a student with long messy hair, white-based shoes with a big, red star logo on it, a long, black wallet with a dragon logo and sharp orange comb sticking out of his back pocket and a school bag that cannot contain no more than 2 textbooks, we immediately label him as a BAD student or even to the extent of an AH BENG.

But can we really how good a person's studies are just by the image he or she portrays in his daily life? For all you know, this so called BAD student has been scoring straight As and getting awards from the school. On the other hand, it's the be-spectacled nerdy looking boy that has trouble getting a pass on his major subjects.

I know that this might sound absolutely absurd but I believe that there really are some people like them. You might say that only people who are under bad influence and with no interest in their studies might dress and behave like our little AH BENG, but there you go again, generalising people with out any second thoughts.
And guess what, our little AH BENG grew up to be cool little ME.

So as you can see, you obviously cannot judge a book by it's cover or even by the 1st few pages roughly flipped through. Not only is this true for humans, it also applies for inanimate objects.

Jes and myself were discussing why people have programmed mindsets about certain things even if it's obviously not true. For example, during dinner, she accidently pulled out a packet of Kotex while searching for tissue paper. And our conversation went something like this...

Jes : Opps... Paiseh.

Anyhow : Never mind lor. Use that to wipe your mouth la.

Jes : Eeep. Er xin. But actually can hor. Give you wipe your mouth u want?

Anyhow : EEEEEEEeeee...

Jes : It's clean what. Never use before. Can absorb sweat somemore.

Anyhow : Yucks!

Jes : If you wake up with pads all over your face will you scold me? Clean one la. Haha.

Anyhow : If you wake up with condoms all over your face will you scold me? Never use before one ma...


And then the conversation went somewhere else... But as you can see, theoratically, it isn't wrong to be using a sanitary pad to wipe your face. But just the thought of it would make any normal person squirm. So would you mind if the next time you woke up u found a bunch of unused pads or condoms scattered over your pretty face? I know I still would...

If we could just learn to look at things without having a pre-concept of them already sketched into our head, this world would be a much more interesting place to live in. But I guess the big fat man in the clouds will never allow such things. Cos when we are just 2 feet tall, everybody else starts polluting our minds with such pre-concepts which are part of our self-proclaimed idealistic, wholistic society.

Where's the fun in that??


Anyhow written on Dec 15, 2006 at 11:42 AM

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The Bestest Blog

If you've been paying real close attention to my blog, you've noticed a link on the right side of the page that says "bestestblogofalltime". And if you didn't, you better start paying more attention to the things outside of my posts...

What this is actually all about is that it's a free and easy way to get your blog noticed as well as increase the amount of traffic coming in and out of your personal writing space on the net. The site has more than 2,000 hits per day and it also has a cool 'Random Blog' button, which is much like blogger's "next blog" button but much better since you don't get your screen all flooded up with funky characters from blogs of other languages. And once you've registered, your blog will be entitled to appear as one of the random blogs when bored people like me do random blog surfing.

For those of you who haven't discovered the power of random blog surfing, what the hell have you been doing in the blogging world for the past few decades?? You are just 1 click away from learning what goes on in a person who lives half way around the world's life. You might even find a cool video or 2 while you're at it. I never knew blogger had such a world-wide audience until I started random blog surfing. So far I've come across blogs from China, India, Iraq and of course millions from the US just to name a few. But let's not digress too much...

What's more, by joining the Bestest Blog ring, your blog also gets a chance to be awarded the "Bestest Blog of the Day" award if Bobby [the owner of thebestestblog] deems your blog to be interesting enough for him to do a review on. That will earn you 3 times the chance of your blog appearing when someone hits the "random blog" button.

And all this can be attained by just a post of a comment on bestestblog and having the link permenently etched on your webspace. And did I mention the informative links on the site that gives your blog cash-earning capabilities just by blogging? I'm still trying to settle some sign-up problem with PayPal before I can start earning bucks during my free time in front of the computer.

So what are you waiting for? Go join the next big thing on this blog-o-sphere now!


Anyhow written on Dec 13, 2006 at 11:21 AM

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What is it with Short Girls and Tall Guys?

It's the same old question time and time again.

"DO GIRLS PREFER TALL GUYS TO SHORTER GUYS?"


The obvious politically correct answer would be: "It doesn't matter how tall you are but rather how much love and care the guy can give to the girl." But face the facts people, ultimately, a female's deepest, darkest primal instincts will still push her to go for the taller man. It all started during the era of cavemen and wooly mammoths...

During the time when dinosaurs roamed the earth and all that protected a man's tool from the elements was a piece of loincloth, the taller caveman was always labelled as the alpha-male. This was because he could reach the higher, fresher fruits on the trees, chase down his lunch and dinners better [longer strides due to longer legs] and even catch more fish cos he could stand deeper in the river without fear of being flushed away. So obviously, the female of the species tend to be more attracted to the taller male because he could provide for her and her family better.

This resulted in a distinguished segregation between the taller, alpha-males and the shorter, less accepted males. Hence, from the beginning of time itself, humanoids had already developed a mindset that tall is always better.

Now, back to mordern day Singapore, although we have been said to have by-passed the historical versions of ourselves many million years ago, some sinister parts of our DNA build still exists from our ancestors. Mainly, the 'self-preservation' rule and 'taller is better' rule. Ask any girl on the street, if given a chance to choose between 2 identical guys, one who's 160cm and the other who's 180cm tall, the answer would be obvious.

Ask them for the reason why, and the standard, non-refundable answer will suffice :

"The taller guy gives me a sense of security."


This is especially true among the majority of the shorter girls. And if that isn't enough to piss the not-so-tall population off, the taller girls themselves always look for someone who's 'taller than them'. So where does that leave us? A public discussion in an open forum lead to the following stereotyping, that a guy must be at least 175cm just to be even considered for a partner for most girls.

So what is it that makes taller guys so much more attractive than us shorter guys? Apart from the [false] sense of security that they emit and the 'taller is better' rule of evolution, a bunch of scientists who have nothing better to do actually did do some research into this topic. And the results say that taller heights suggust that the guy has good genes or comes from a wealthy family. And they even go as far as stating a survey result that showed taller men are more likely to produce kids than their shorter counterparts. There are even rumours that taller men have longer D*CKS due to the proportioning of their body-height ratio.

But before you tall people get your balls carried over the rainbow, I'd like to bring you back to earth, and pull along those girls with the 'taller man' fantasies along with u. For one, shorter men tend to have longer lifespans. We also have better personalities, just becuase we have to, in order to match up to those tall, muscular dumb dumbs we see around every corner. And shorter guys strangely have a better sense of humour, I mean, have you ever seen a TALL stand-up comedian?

As for the [false] sense of security they give you, many girls who have tall guys for partners say that it wears out over time. Sure, a big, stulking bloke can look intemidating to your would-be attackers, but how sure are you that he won't start to weep like a baby when a knife is pointed at his oh-so-big chest? Shorter guys have better, faster and sharper natural reflexes then most tall guys, and I dare to say that I can hold my ground in any fight.

So shorte guys fret not, we still can stand our ground against our taller counterparts, we just need to work harder than them to get the girls to notice us. And once she does, just let your personality do the rest. Being tall only gets you noticed, being great gets you everywhere else. And as quoted from one of the gals in the forum...

SHORT GUYS DO IT BETTER



And of course, my personal favourite quote:

God made me perfect, he just made everyone else taller


Anyhow written on Dec 11, 2006 at 10:33 AM

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The Weekend of Shopping Centres

Singaporeans are forever complaining that they don't have enough shopping centres to fulfill our ever-growing shopping spree desires. And through the events that occurred over this weekend, I truely understood why.

On Saturday, we headed to Jurong Point to get our bookings done for our March cruise trip. So there we were, happily making our way up the escalators when suddenly I noticed a very disturbing sight. After closely examining the people gliding down the opposite side of the elscalator, we concluded in disgust that 8 out of 10 people going down the escalator, [heck, 8 out of 10 in the entire shopping centre] were black-skinned! And not just any ordinary black-skinned people, but almost 90% of them were Bangalas!!! They should have rename the shopping centre to Bangala Point!

Was it "Bangala's Night Out" or something?? It was like freaking Orchard Road during Christmas Eve Countdown. Even the queue to the POSB ATM was over-flooding with over-sized 'Bo-Seng-Li' polo T, Pasar Malam quality jeans wearing construction workers. The line was freaking backed all the way up the stairs from B1 to the first floor. Do all Bangalas in Singapore get their pay on exactly the same day? And even if it were true, do all of them have to check their bank balance at the same time? Please give me a reason why the queue for the ATM was in the ratio of 7 Bangalas : 1 Singaporean. And these Bangalas really have weird tastes. I spotted a few groups of them posing for pictures with a normal Christmas tree behind the glass of a shopfront when there were 3 extra-large, overly decorated Display Trees just in the atrium 10 steps behind them.

And to complete the wonderful spoiling of my already saddened day [I was still recovering from my Throat Infection], a fat lady decided to piss me off while we were waiting for tables at the food court. We had 8 people in total hence we need to get 2 tables at the least. So my eagle-eyes scouted 2 side-by-side tables of small families who were almost done with their dinners and I decided to give them more pressure by standing beside their tables.

But as I was trying to get the attention of my people, one of my scouted tables [which I was already standing next to] stood up and left. And when I turned around, a fat hippo in a pink dress [Note to all : FAT and PINK don't make a good combination] hurriedly placed her huge ass on on of the empty seats. Being the gentleman that I am, I POLITELY told her that I was already waiting for the table. And she had the cheek to tell me "I was also waiting for the table." Hello! If you were there before me, why didn't I see your sorry pink fat ass while I was waiting for the table? Nobody could miss your pink hippo ass from a mile away. And here's the best part... She was a freakin Indian. Normally I'm not racist against Indians, but I think this hippo was a mis-product of an affair gone wrong between an Indian prostitute and a bangala worker. And I guess she had her own share of mis-fortune too, seeing that she was taking care of a young kid, while the father didn't turn up even up till the point when we left after our dinner. I was almost going to start a big commotion but lucky for her Jes pulled me away in time.


That was for Saturday. And just today, we were supposed to go to Vivo City for some shopping, but somehow we ended up at Suntec City instead. This was because of the huge crowd TRYING to get into Vivo City and HarbourFront Mall carparks. The queue was nay long stretching from the barrier into the carpark and tailing back all the way to the main road. If they are going to make such a humongous shopping mall, why can't they do the same with the carpark? I mean Suntec City isn't as big as Vivo City, but I never once had problems finding a lot, let alone getting into the carpark. The people running Singapore these days only have papers but they sure are lacking in the practicality department.

And the funny thing was, we actually overshot the Tanjong Pagar exit and had to U-turn back at Suntec, only to find out that the freaking carpark was freaking packed. So in the end we decided to make our way back to Suntec.


And to end off my daily ramblings, I found out that the character L in the Death Note manga was actually model-drawn after me! If you don't believe me, see it for yourself.

   
See the striking resemblence, aside from the hair??


Anyhow written on Dec 10, 2006 at 10:15 PM

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On Medication Again

Went to the doctor's last night to get myself medicated again. Been semi-sick since last week with a rotation of sore-throats, runny noses and coughs through out the week. At first I thought I could save some bucks by curing myself through self-medication, but it seems that my body thinks otherwise.

It seems to have become a routine every 2 or 3 months. Me falling sick, visiting the family doctor and having him ask me to do the same thing and give me the same medication everytime. Here's a brief synopsis of the routine that will almost definitely take place everytime I visit him:

1. Opening the door, I'll tell him I've got what seems to be a throat infection

2. He'll take a Paddlepop ice-cream stick, stick it in my mouth and ask me to say 'AHHH', and ask me what colour my phlegm is: Greenish or yellowish.

3. He might or might not take a mini torchlight and shine it into my nose to look at the amount of nose-sh*t stuck inside

4. Lifting my shirt, he puts his metallic nipple-presser on various parts of the front and back of my body asking me to take deep breathes as he searches whether I grew additional nipples anywhere on my body.

5. DIAGNOSTICS : THROAT INFECTION or VIRIAL INFECTION

6. Medicine and MC will be passed down to be through the counter, with the counter missy telling me how handsome I look. [I'm still an auntie-killer even when I'm sick]


And if you ask Jes, that was exactly what happened during the visit. I even described the entire sequence on our way to the doc's and it happened just as I said it.


So anywhy, the entire hoo-haa resulted me being here, sitted on my comfy chair at home, blogging about it just 15 minutes after I woke up. And the best part is, it's the weekend! Long weekend here I come!! Muahahaha...


Anyhow written on Dec 8, 2006 at 11:13 AM

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My Poor Bag

My lovely Spider bag has 1 great flaw... It can't take the weight of a laptop. Carried my laptop in the bag around Orchard on Tuesday as me and Jes went to do some shopping. 2.4kg might not seem like a heavy load to any of us, but try carrying 2.4kg on your right shoulder for almost 2 hours of walking. Then you will know how heavy 2.4kg is.

Anyway it wasn't the weight that broke my heart, [of course! During NS we had to carry heavier bags and walk longer distances] but rather the sight of my bag the next morning when I brought it to work.

In the lift I noticed a little white coming from my bag. For your info, my bag is orange, red and black, with no trace of white at all. On closer inspection, I realised to my horror that the material, hear this... THE MATERIAL, that the sling was sewn onto was ripped obviously due to too much weight. The sewing of the sling to the bag was still almost perfect but the material itself gave way resulting in a small bundle of white coloured threads flaring about by the side. To put it in layman's terms, it's just like a stapler bullet being stapled to 2 pieces of paper and the paper by the side of the stapler bullet being ripped due to too much pressure. And the bag is only about a month old!

Lucky for me I know the seller quite well and he said he'll do another one FOC for me. Guess I'll have to wait for Christmas to get my new bag...

*sing* All I want for Christmas is my new impulse bag... *sing*


Anyhow written on Dec 7, 2006 at 9:20 AM

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New Skin, New Layout, New Notebook!!

Finally finished my revamp of the blog. How do you like it? No more straining your eyes to see those microscopic text in that tiny little window. No more needing to click on the tiny picture to view it in it's full glory. Welcome back larger text size and of course bigger and clearer pictures!

Number of hours spent on revamp:

5 December - 2pm to 5.30pm, 11pm to 1.30am = 6 hours
6 December - 11am to 12pm, 2pm to 3pm = 2 hours
TOTAL : 8 hours.


It's a new record! Normally I would take almost 12 hours to finish customizing a layout and what knots, but this one only took me 8 whole hours. And I must say I'm quite satisfied with the result too. Only the girl in the background is taken from the net, everything else in this page is 100% the result of hardwork and sweat put in by yours truely.

And to top it all off, I get myself a new notebook. Weighing in at less than 1kg, garanteed to never hang or crash on you and even comes in a leather-like soft-cover. No dummies, it's not a laptop-notebook, its a real notebook-notebook. And 2 words are printed on the front cover.... "DEATH NOTE"

It's the exact replica [size and design] of the one used in the Manga. It even includes instructions on 'How to use the Death Note' as well as the actual handwritten names and death descriptions of those killed by Kira. Notice I stated Manga, cos there are slight differences in the storyline between the Manga and the movie. And if you haven't caught either one, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?? As a display of my great generousity, I shall reveal where you can get FREE screenings of the Manga. Just search youtube.com for 'Death Note Episode X', where X reprents the episode number you're looking for. The Jap version is released every Friday and the subbed, every Saturday. Watch it and you will understand why everyone's so crazy over Death Note.

P.S. Enjoy the song, heard it playing in the Marina Square foodcourt and I knew at once I had to get it...


Anyhow written on Dec 6, 2006 at 3:04 PM

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A Very Traditional Weekend

This weekend was one of the most traditional weekends I have ever had in my entire lifetime on this planet. On Saturday, I was forced to accompany the school teachers and students to the Singapore Conference Hall to supervise whatever they could get me to supervise during the schools' performances. It was a Chinese Orchastra Concert jointly held by 2 schools, and my school just happened to be 1 of them.

So there I was, at 4pm on a Saturday afternoon, wondering what I was doing at a place like that. Don't be fooled by the name "Singapore Conference Hall", the entire place was practically a worship ground for famous Chinese musicians, with their faces painted on almost every inch of the walls. One look at it and you would think that no International Conference would ever be held here due to the racial imbalance of the place. Even just by looking at the main entrance you would have guessed it was some sort of Chi-na place, unless you're blind enough to miss the gigantic drums that line the inside of the doorways...



Anyway, being an 'official', I was allowed to watch them practice as well as to watch the actual show all for free. Yes, the music made by Drums, Gongs and singular stringed instruments were pleasing to the ear, dynamic and what knot, but it just ain't my cup of Chinese tea. So there I was, seated in an open-to-public-for-$12 seat, half-listening to the performance, while concentrating on my snake game on my handphone.

And after all the hype was over, we had to supervise the loading and unloading of equipment from the Hall back to school. I shouldn't use the word supervise cos I myself had to lend a helping hand to bring the equipment up 3 floors of stairs to the Orchastra room. By the time everything was over, it was almost 1130. But at least on the up side, I'm gonna be rewarded with 1 day off, so I guess it wasn't all that bad.


The next day, we had to wake up early to attend Jes' collegue's Malay Wedding. Truth be told, this was the 1st time I was officially invited to a Malay Wedding, not counting those gate-crashed weddings where we just went for the free food.

The difference between Chinese weddings and Malay weddings is that Chinese like to be served to make them feel like some sort of bigshots, thats why the food has to come dish by dish, served to the table and even dished out for each individual in some cases. Malay weddings on the other hand, is a more casual environment, where the food is laid out in a buffet line and invitees help themself to the feast. Other than that, everything else is pretty much the same, apart from the various traditional practices of each culture.


No, the couple in the middle is their parents dummy.
The wedding couple is by the side.


But the weirdest thing about the Malay wedding, it was always the bride who comes early and waits for the groom to arrive, which is the total opposite from any other wedding where the groom always waits for the bride. And even when the groom arrives, the make-up artist covers the bride's face with a foldable fan and the groom is forced to pay some incentives to the make-up artist before the fan finally comes down and he gets to see his beautiful bride. Other than the rackus made when the groom arrives there didn't seem to be any other ceremony that they had to perform.

After wishing the couple good luck, we went to catch a movie at Marina Square. Since it was the starting of December, we bought tickets to Deck The Halls to live up the Christmas spirit. [Ok, the real reason was that there weren't any other better shows to catch.] And surprisingly, some parts in the movie did again refer to traditions. Is it just a coincidence or something else. I donno you decide.

So after we finished the movie, we went on a traditional shopping spree of christmas presents, [none of which belonged to me, DANG!] before dragging our tired asses back home for a good night's rest.


Anyhow written on Dec 4, 2006 at 3:54 PM

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Complaints, Complaints

Many people [or rather many important readers that I know] have been complaining about my blog layout. They say the blog area, text and pictures are all like me... Too small and petit. They asked me to change back to something like my previous xanga layout, where the entire page was made use of. So, here I am, searching for a new blog skin that will satisfy the undying needs of my few but faithful readers. Most probably a new skin and song will be up by next week.

But since everybody has their share of complaints, I shall share mine too. Remember my new baby? I was quite amazed at the battery life on the first day of using my N73. I had made almost 2 hours of calls during my working hours but at 7pm in the evening, it was still showing an amazing 75% battery life. I even asked my friend, who is a 2nd-hand handphone dealer, if this was normal. He said that it would only be like this for the starting period, after which it would die of like any other Nokia battery within 2 to 3 days.

But alas, it was not meant to be. When I reached home, I was shocked to see that the battery had dropped from 5/6 bars to 2/6 bars. And this even without me dailing a single number from the time I spoke to my friend to that very second. Thinking maybe it was because the phone is new, I didn't take much notice of it and charged it overnight when it dropped to 1 bar.

But it seemed that every day after that, from a fully charged battery in the morning, it would drop to almost dead by night time, even without much use of the phone. [Mind you, I'm working for most of the day so my phone will always be on silent mode while I'm working]

This really pissed me off and I went to complain to Nokia Care yesterday. When I got there, the queue was freaking long. There were like 12 people queueing to get a queue number. No wonder they say Singaporeans like to queue. This also shows how reliable Nokia products are. Anyway, lucky for me most of the complaints were about the phones, and I only had to wait for 2 people to get my chance to complain about the battery. And guess what? Quoting the exact words from the serviceperson "I'm sorry but we're out of stock for your batterys right now. The only thing we can do is to give you a call once we have the stock and you can come down and do a 1 to 1 exchange."

So I guess mine wasn't the only battery with the problem! Hopefully they really get back to me within 2 weeks [as they said the stock will come within 2 weeks] or else I'll be at their necks again. I still love my baby, its just that I'm getting sick and tired of having to charge her up everyday. Handphones are such a chore.


Anyhow written on Dec 1, 2006 at 3:37 PM

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